Woman claims she witnessed Molly Malone Statue Shed a Tear

It's been an exciting March in Ireland- from the celebrations of St.Patrick's weekend to the announcement of the Electric Picnic line up coming this summer, but nothing has quite stunned this editorial team than hearing from the American tourist who may have witnessed a miracle.

Aimee Hartly is a small woman, no taller than five-foot in height, wearing a purple hat unmatched with a golden scarf wrapped around her auburn jacket. She's biting her lip and trembling slightly when I meet her in the lobby of the Westbury on Saturday afternoon. She has a story, she tells me.

After her revelation, she tells me a bit about her own upbringing- adopted by a kind American couple years ago, she believes she might have been one of the Magdalene children and has come back to Ireland to explore what might be her ancestry. Her parents told her she was adopted from a small town north of Maine, but her heart tells her differently. Like other Americans I've met in my long journalistic career that has spanned four months, she doesn't have any real evidence she's Irish but she feels it in her heart. It was this instinctive Irish calling that made her quit her job working in DMV in Philadelphia last month and book a ten day trip to Ireland.

Trying to get to the substance of her claim, I pressed further about her knowledge of Ireland. Had she heard of Ballinspittle? I implored, thinking she might have read about the Virgin Mary claimed to have moved spontaneously there in July of 1985. Or maybe Templemore? Where a stunt of a bleeding statue halted troops in Tipperary 100 years ago? The answer is no, that Aimee Hartly doesn't know anything about Irish history except the laundries, which brings up a lot of other questions about her trip to Ireland that this tender journalist was afraid to ask. I asked her about her knowledge of Italian history, with their lore of weeping statue phenomenons, or perhaps the 2018 story of the weeping Virgin Mary in New Mexico. The answer was a resounding 'no' and she accused me of trying to make her claim religious. Molly Malone is not a religious figure, she points out. And she's right. But, I counter, the only statues that generally move seem to be related to the Catholic Church. No, says she, this was something totally awesome.

In her own words, unedited:

"I was just minding my own business, strolling, you know? I went to Trinitay and saw that university then wanted to get a sandwich, and I was like 'God darn it there ain't nowhere nice to get a sandwich in this town!'. I wanted an Irish sandwich- with stuffing- or even a biscuit with stuffing, I wasn't gonna discriminate!

And it was about eleven o'clock in the morning and there wasn't anyone near Molly, and I went up to her. And I've been reading about her, about her story and I felt like that was my story too. I mean, I ain't no fishwife, or hooker, nor did I ever eat a cockle (do you know what that is? I mean, I don't see cockles on the menus around here) but anyway! What I have in common with Ms Molly is that I'm a woman. And she was a woman. I think she honest to God felt that too- that we are both women- and you know in this world with Trump and all- and I was feeling so sad and I think she was too. THEN I watched as the biggest old crocodile tear came running down her face from her right eye, and it dripped on to the ground and made a lil old puddle. And, darling, I just started crying and crying. I curled up at the base of that statue and then, I guess hours passed and people tried to help me but I couldn't be helped and then these police men- I guess they were? But they're not called police men here they're called Gard-ee- they made me leave.

They wouldn't listen to my story. I wanted to talk to your president, or at least your prime minister- Vuradcur is it? Someone has to hear it. Anyway, I got in touch with you because I think you can share it with your audience. So people know she's hurting."

Ms Hartly is quite in tears as she finishes her story. People in the Westbury are beginning to look at us. When I mention that there was talk last week about moving the statue to stop people groping her breasts- she grabs my hands in hers and says,"That's it! She doesn't want to be moved!"

But wouldn't she want to be moved if she was sad? Is she sad she's being moved or sad she's getting groped by thousands of tourists every month? Again, I was too afraid to ask.